Father of two daughters

            I vividly remember the day when my younger one went to pre-school.             It was five years ago. She was two. We had been preparing her mentally for the concept of school – a place where there would be no mummy or papa, or even nanaji (grandfather), but where she would still have a lot of fun. My elder one had contributed to the process by telling about the fun she had with her teachers and friends. She was somewhat convinced, but was still apprehensive.             The school was the ground floor of a neighbouring building. The walls were colourful and had a lot of cartoon characters – that surely was a good omen. The teacher was friendly, and talked very sweetly. She did not use her pet name, but called her Shaivi. This was a sign that she was being treated like a big girl – a girl ready to go to ...

I love to play. I am not a national champion in any game. In fact, I can play only a few games, and am not very good in any game that I play. But I love to go out and play. I am blessed, in a way. My job ensures that I regularly interact with many champions and aspiring sportsmen on a regular basis. I believe that some of their enthusiasm and love for game rubs on me. I have started enjoying the concept of playing, and I am physically more active than most of my colleagues. A spinoff of this situation is that while most parents are rushing their children from school to tuitions, I encourage my daughters to go and sweat it out. Let me tell you about my elder daughter’s typical day. She gets up in the morning – after a lot of coercion, I should add, and my wife and I have to shout our lung out to ensure that she is in time for the school. She is rarely late, though. In fact, she looks forward to school – speaks volumes about our success in the choice of school and art of pare...

“Children are a gift from the Gods”             We have all heard the saying. Not having a male child is still considered to be synonymous with a failed marriage. It seems that the entire purpose of marrying is to produce a male offspring.             The reasons for a very clear male preference are numerous. I have tried to sum up a few from the point of view of my relatives and elders. Sons will carry forth the family name.        This is the first point that all elders come up with. It is closely associated with children keeping their father’s name, not their mother’s. And it is quite true. Perhaps that is why it is always brought out first. Thankfully, the society is giving greater credits to the achievements of the girls as well, and your daughter stands an equal chance of making you proud if you provide her with an equal opportuni...

Let me begin at the very end. We made a list of likely names based on a simple google search each time, and came up with the final options. My wife and I deliberated on these and decided on the name.              While that is the truth about choosing the name, the matter was not as simple. The chief problems included: 1.                   We did not know the sex of any of the children prior to birth. (Disclaimer: It is illegal in India to try to find out the sex of the child prior to birth. It is a punishable criminal offense, and for a very good reason.   I fully stand by the law of the country and I do not advocate sex determination prior to birth.) 2.                   Many relatives had laid claim to the right of naming the child when the time came....

Shaivi was born four years later. This time, I was ready for either daughter or son. As luck would have it, we were blessed with another daughter. My wife and I are both doctors, and we come from families with considerable education. With this backdrop, I was definitely not prepared for the negative reaction that I got from my relatives. A certain less educated, female relative asked us as to how we had daughter when we both were doctors. Most others tried to put on a brave face and suggested that we should not lose hope and must continue trying. All this was very new to me. While I had seen some relatives being disappointed with my firstborn being a girl, they had joined us in giving her unconditional love. Aadya, my firstborn, had seen nothing but love and affection in the four years of her existence. I found it extremely annoying that I wanted to celebrate the new life, but there were many who were trying to console me for what they perceived to be my misfortune. Even my...

I am 42 years old, and I have two daughters. I have been brought up in a society that craves sons. When we were expecting our first child, all our relatives wished us a son. I tried hard not to appear disappointed at their wish, for I really wanted a daughter. On the appointed day, my wife was wheeled to the operation theatre. I was worried, both for my wife and my child. My mother - in - law was there to give me company. As is the custom in India, I was not allowed inside the operation theatre. After a few minutes, a nurse announced that that the goddess of wealth and luck had decided to bless our house. I do not remember my exact reaction, except that I was elated. But my mother - in - law says that she has never seen a person who was happier than I was at the time. A man, probably relative of another patient, decided to console me. But I was too happy to be angry with him. We named her Aadya. She was the beginning of something new. She was the goddess that existed at the beg...