A little study and a little play: my pre – teen daughter is growing up


I love to play. I am not a national champion in any game. In fact, I can play only a few games, and am not very good in any game that I play. But I love to go out and play.


I am blessed, in a way. My job ensures that I regularly interact with many champions and aspiring sportsmen on a regular basis. I believe that some of their enthusiasm and love for game rubs on me. I have started enjoying the concept of playing, and I am physically more active than most of my colleagues.


A spinoff of this situation is that while most parents are rushing their children from school to tuitions, I encourage my daughters to go and sweat it out.


Let me tell you about my elder daughter’s typical day. She gets up in the morning – after a lot of coercion, I should add, and my wife and I have to shout our lung out to ensure that she is in time for the school. She is rarely late, though. In fact, she looks forward to school – speaks volumes about our success in the choice of school and art of parenting.


At school, she studies and plays and shouts and fights with her friends and gets dirty. She is not very aggressive – we have to keep coercing her towards greater aggression in her sports and her dealing with “mischievous friends”. She has few friends, but shares almost everything with the few friends that she has. In her previous school, she was a part of basketball team and had to stay behind to practice. However, her present school does not have such facility.


She comes back exhausted after school. I have tried to encourage her to have something to drink on the way back, like a tetra-pack of flavoured milk, but she does not often have it. What happens next depends on how much energy she is left with. Sometimes, she wants to take a nap even before she has changed. We try to ensure that she eats something before that. On most other days, she quietly sits for lunch. After lunch, she goes for her sports lesson. She is not very regular, as she misses it when she has her siesta. This frustrates her coach who feels that she has a lot of potential. I try to encourage her – and my wife says that I push her too hard.


After games and bath, we try to get her to study. Once again, this is surprisingly not too difficult. Our focus is on getting the homework done. While she sometimes struggles with the volume of work in maths, she does not usually face too much problem in any subject. Whenever she comes up with a concept that she is struggling with, we gather our resources and try to get her concepts right. we succeed most of the times. In case of further, or unresolved doubts, we encourage her to discuss with her friends as well as teacher at school. Till now, this has never failed her.


Games take a couple of hours post school, and studies take another hour or so, although both are marked by lots of flexibility and non – uniformity. At this stage, it is time to eat and sleep. We try to get her to dining table by 8 and get her ready for bed by 8:30.


She has developed a nice bedtime routine, something that I am very happy about. She makes up her bag for the following day, gets her uniform in order, brushes her teeth, and goes to bed with a book in hand. These books are stories – fiction or history not from the coursework, and she reads for 15 – 30 minutes every night before falling asleep.


I have tried to explain to her that sports and physical activity are as important as reading for proper development. I don’t think that she understands. She enjoys her school, she enjoys sports, and she enjoys reading.


She is enjoying growing up. And that is all that matters.

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